empty house

it’s just me home this evening.  paul and tally and percy are at his parents at present.  it just feels too weird.  it also feels like i should be doing my best imitation of a whirling dervish about the house getting a billion and one tasks done while there is time and space.  however the muscular back lash from the crash has pretty much siezed up the right side of my neck and shoulder- i can barely turn my head let alone do house work or gardening… or wash the blood off the car.  i’m typing leaning over in a “lurch” sort of hunch.  pain killers help but i’m saving them for when i go to bed and try to sleep.  sook, sook, sook… i’m so mad at myself for having the accident in the first place, now i have limited patience for my slow recovery.

car crash

i’m an idiot, idiot, idiot, idiot, I-DI-OT!

on friday afternoon, on the way to pick paul up form the train station i managed to put our car in the path of an oncoming one and crunch up the front of it.  i blacked out and bleed all over the place from a big cut on my head but thank everyone and anyone you want to percy and tally, strapped in their seats in the back, were unharmed.  sometimes luck can be with you- so while not being a car sandwich would have been better the first person to pull up was a ambulance officer.  nice.  the second was first aid trained.  nice.

i haven’t recalled memories of the actual impact or for a short while afterwards yet.  who wants to remember that sort of thing?

while i got a spiffy ambulance trip to st george hospital poor paul had to walk percy and tally home.  i only thought about it much later but that would have been an absolutely horrific situation to have to deal with;  bleeding, babbling wife and two babies to get safely home.  paul has been a complete hero and looked after us all admirably.   so i’m off in the ambulance, he can’t come with me, he’s been told he’s not allowed to take the children’s seats out of our car, he’s wrapped his good work shirt around tally because he was only in a nappy (remember i thought i was popping out for five minutes to the train station and back), blood on his face, gamely trudging home.  on a plus side my parents were down for the weekend because it was percy’s thrid birthday.  poor munchkin, her party was shelved.  we’ll just have to have a super enormous 4th birthday party to make up for it.  so my mum and dad were able to take over lots of babysitting.

and now i feel like a lie down… back later…

damn i just added to this but lost it all in haste.  i don’t feel like writing it again.  sorry. maybe later.

day one

post sleep school

here’s how the night went:

6:35pm into cot after usual bed time routine.  one return visit to assure he was still ok and loved, with very short pat

6:45pm asleep by himself!  (probably helped that he’d been up for four hours previously and had had a big day)

10:38pm woke, had 40mls dream feed of formula, change nappy (unecessary as it was dry), back into cot, asleep by himself within 4 minutes,

11:55pm woke, paul and i took turns shushing him and patting him and also picking him up when he really howled for 40 minutes.  gave a small drink of water- no effect. kept shushing and patting finally paul had him quiet in his arms and when he lay down he didn’t cry any more and went to sleep; at 1:50am.  i think this might have been a bit of a cheat as he was as good as asleep in pauls arms and we’re not to rock him to sleep any more.

6:15am up for the day.

i say not too bad for the first night.  i will call our sleep school place later and get her feedback too.

lovely gorgeous boy bounced for an hour in the shopping trolley this morning as i did the shopping and possibly wore himself out.  at 9:20am, upon returning home he went into his cot with a little burble and i haven’t heard from him since.

gosh it would be so nice to have long periods of uninterrupted sleep again.  the return of a normal life??!!

sleep school

we bit the (rather expensive) bullet today and took tally to “sleep school.”  seems to be working already.  let’s see how the whole night goes before we proclaim the value.

see you sans baggy eyes in the morning!

side sleeping

tally has started to sleep on his side.  just yesterday and today.  he seems to roll himself back to his back because that’s where he is when i see him later but it’s cute to see him lieing on his side with his face snuggled close to roco (his sleeping buddy/toy.)

in general we may have turned a corner in the last five days in regards to tally sleeping.  he’s definately doing more of it and for longer stretches.  hope i haven’t jinxed it now!

percy saying “good bye” to things

percy says good bye to many things.  the park and the trees when we leave, to the house when we are going out, to her bike when she gets off, to people, to shops.  it’s nice.

the other day we were pulling out of the driveway as percy listed off her good byes, all well and good.  then she pipped “good bye dead cat.”  huh wha..!?

“percy, do you mean pi?” we ask

” yes” comes the reply, “he’s dead now.”

oh my, did we laugh.  tho it was a bit macabre too.

a smoking example

what is it with health care workers and smoking?  i had occasion to visit both sutherland hospital and kareena private hospital this morning, during this hour or so i saw six or seven staff outside having a puff.  it just seems such an odd juxtaposition that workers in this industry indulge in this life threatening activity.  i mean i hate all smokers regardless of their employment status or type but this just seems so weird to me.  perhaps they’ve seen so much ill-health and death they have become immune to their own fragility.

even worse i suppose is the handful of people that are constantly congregated outside the missenden road entrance to RPA, in gowns, with tubes and drips and bags and bandages, puffing away too.